Comedy Mercenary
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Welcome
The official website of Mark J. Thomas, Comedy Mercenary.

I live in Colorado - one of the square states. Wyoming is the other - definitely not as funny. (Alleged VP dick cheney lives there sometimes - go figure.) The residents of western Colorado are refreshingly supportive of stand-up comedy.  And there's plenty to laugh at here. (Stay with me.) There's the weather (it can snow any month of the year - indoors or out). It has quaint traffic jams (up to FOUR LANES at a time -- pickups and Subarus, mostly). There's uncaged wildlife (bears at the garbage, elk by the highway, furs in the produce sections). We survive on construction and tourists ("guests", as we're instructed to call them). And there's just enough oxygen to keep the heart pumping and help squeeze out a few glorious laughs from appreciative, local audiences. On a good night. 

Comedy fans know that the Aspen Comedy Festival (an HBO thing) was building up quite a reputation here for 13 years ('94-'07). Big names: Williams (Robin & Katt), Python, SNL, Carlin, Chappelle, Silverman (adult link!), Black, Colbert, (bonus link: Washington Correspondent's Dinner video!) Wright...).  But they decided to close the doors on the event. And word was it was moving to...Santa Barbara. Hilarious, comedy-ground-breaking Santa Freakin' Barbara. Well, that rumor has been squashed, so TBS is picking up the ball. Where it lands...we'll see.

In the meantime, the locals have fully embraced the effort by relatively inexperienced locals (like myself) to pick up the ball and bring fresh, live, local stand-up to stages in the Aspen area.

This is my first effort at a website, so be patient. As it builds I'll post info about upcoming events, appearances, other comedians, and whatever strikes my comic nerve.

I'll post audio and video as I get it together. Two clips to the right are a start. The Aspen Glass Pinata was an April Fools piece that ran on KSNO radio all day. The other is a clip from a set I did last sumer at the Winchester Nite Club in Rifle. (We'll be back there this summer. GREAT crowds!)

The Bio page has some background on me, for you aspiring stalkers. There are a few photos.  I'm making stuff to sell, like the bumper sticker.

Such a long story in such a short sentence.
T-shirts and mugs are coming.

And that's it for now. Stay tuned. Write if you have a question or comment. And keep smiling. It keeps the crushing depression of everyday reality at bay, for awhile, anyway.

Cheers ~

Standup at Steve's Guitars - Aug. 2008

Observations on life in the Roaring Fork Valley - and beyond... For a short sample, click the little blue arrow to the left of the segment title. For the whole bit, click "Download MP3". Enjoy!


Track Title Price
Hippie Dancing [0:55]  Free
 
So you think you can Hippie Dance? Just hop & spin, hop & spin, hop-hop-hop & spin. There...That was easy, wasn't it?!
Carbondale Stop Signs [2:15]  Free
 
What happens when a 2 stop-sign town suddenly adds another 8 on Main Street? MAYHEM!
Who Goes To Mountain Fair? EVERYBODY! [2:42]  Free
 
The largest gathering of aging hippies on Colorado's western slope. And EVERYBODY'S invited!
Steve's Guitars Loyalty Oath [1:35]  Free
 
If it's good enough for the Bush brown-shirts, it's good enough for Steve's Guitars. Everybody, raise your right hand...
Hamster at the Vet [0:57]  [lyrics] Free
 
I love animals. Really, I do. But....



Guitar Intervention,June '08
Track Title Price
Guitar Intervention at Steve's, Carbondale [4:32]  Free



Aspen Glass Pinatas
Track Title Price
Aspen Glass Pinata radio spot, KSNO [1:32]  Free



Rifle, CO August, 2007
Track Title Price
Carbondale, Colorado. [4:13]  Free
 
Life and driving in Colorado's western slope...



Seuss-A-Palooza


On the 6th day of March, in the mountains of Aspen,
In the white of the snow there was heard a great gaspin’
He was thrashing, and struggling with a chest full of goo
It was Horton the elephant, fighting the flu.

Read the rest of "Horton Has The Flu"...
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